That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
