I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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