I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Drake has all the answers
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
