this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
