Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Randomize
