You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
