ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
you traded sex for a burrito?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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