He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
