Who did Billy Mays play for?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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