Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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