Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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