the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Randomize
