So gin and wine won't be happening again
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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