I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
