that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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