yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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