you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
