love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
