Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
