You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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