He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
You're like the curious george of whores
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
