They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I think my moral compass just broke
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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