So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
