My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
