Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
