Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
