Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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