I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Just high enough for therapy.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
