good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
