my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
