would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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