Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
