Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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