Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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