either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
