He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
How does one acquire holy water?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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