dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The struggles of a small town man whore
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
