So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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