doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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