So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
