She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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