kristin has been a bad kristin
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
