We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
