In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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