Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
