i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
