Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
