What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
This is the high leading the old right now
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
