I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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