Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
